I was at Shawnee Nazarene Academy yesterday morning to do a professional development presentation for the teachers on emotional regulation. It was tough to prepare for in this period of chaos, and my anxiety wouldn't let me do anything more than handwritten notes. Added to that, the fact that going into church spaces makes my blood run cold right now made the morning rough.

I was panicky on the way and couldn't stop crying. By the time I got there, I had calmed down enough to go in, but I was unsure how it would go.

Flashback to last fall. We had just started at SNA before my trip to Africa. Stepping into the quiet of the sanctuary at Shawnee Church of the Nazarene, God met me in that space.

I wrote a post about it at the time and shared pictures at https://www.threepurplehearts.com/.../i-stepped-into... This morning, I was seeking to steady myself before I joined the group, so I went back into that sanctuary.

I've been in and out and through there since then for programs and quizzes and school things... But there's something different when it's just me. When the lights are off, and the sun is shining through the windows, it reminds me who I am... and whose I am.

And I think I had forgotten about the how important those things were to remember until I went in there again yesterday morning. But as I knelt to pray, I noticed it again... and it was like coming home.

The presentation went super well. The teachers were engaged far more than I had even dared to hope they would be. The principal was affirming of the direction and the information. And we had a small crowd of people talking about how to raise emotionally healthy kids into the leaders we believe they can be someday.

Some days I feel like a caterpillar that is still fighting to get into the cocoon… but yesterday, that purple butterfly reminded me that, in so many ways, I’m already flying.

Whatever stage of change you’re in, keep going. It’s worth it to do the hard things now for tomorrow to be better. And you’re worth the effort!

I love you all!